The strangest thing happened on my way home.....

When I was young, we moved to the Denver area. I lived there my entire childhood and on into my teen years. Then we moved back to Tulsa. I don’t know about where you live, but in the wintertime in Colorado it snows. A lot. Tulsa, however, is a much different story.

In Tulsa, we probably get 1 good snow a year, occasionally more, occasionally less. In lieu of snow, we get ice. Everywhere. On everything. Every year. Last year we had a terrible ice storm that crippled most of the city for several days, even longer for some parts.

Oh how I miss the beautiful, fluffy powder that washes the world in white. *sigh* But I digress…

Understanding that we get ice EVERY YEAR, one would suppose that people would learn how to drive on it. (I guess that is just too much to ask.) And that, dear friends, is where my story begins.

Because of the ice, TPS has cancelled classes for the last 2 days. Yesterday afternoon J’s friend called and asked if she could spend the night. We agreed and she did. This evening, Tobey dropped by a friend’s house to borrow some sleds (thank you Jillian!) and then went on to pick J up from the friend’s house. The apartment complex in which the friend lives sits at the top of a short but steep hill. He had to turn off of the main road onto a road that runs beside the complex. When he got to the turn, there was another car in front of him waiting to turn. She couldn’t turn because a minivan had turned onto the hill and gotten stuck. Tobey, Good Samaritan that he is, decided to pass the car in front of him and turn into a parking lot just past the stuck van, which fed back out onto the side street. He parked his car, got out, and went to the van. The driver was a young woman in her early twenties all alone. By the time he reached her, a Suburban had pulled in front of her, and the driver of the suburban, had decided to wrap a chain around her bumper and pull her up the hill.

Tobey assessed the situation and suggested that, instead of pulling her, it might be wise to back the minivan onto the main road, turn around, and go through the parking lot as he had done. Everyone agreed that was a good plan, but the woman begged for Tobey to do the driving. She was scared that she would get stuck again. He agreed and climbed into the driver’s seat while she climbed in the passenger seat. (Mistake #1)

As he climbed in, he noticed 2 things he thought odd: #1. There was a roll of twenties in the door handle. #2. The van smelled not only of cigarette smoke, but some kind of smoke as well…..

He carefully backed the car into the road, drove north until he found a safe place to turn around, passed a police officer, and then headed back toward the parking lot. All the while, the woman talked about how she was so glad her babies weren’t with her, and how scary driving on the ice is. As she talked, he kept hearing a strange buzzing sound. He finally realized it was coming from the roll of twenties in the door handle. He asked the woman if it was her phone and she told him it was.

They finally reached the parking lot. As they pulled in, he noticed a Jeep Cherokee pulling in the opposite end of the lot. The woman leaned forward and said, “I think that’s who I’m here to meet.” Tobey pulled toward our car and the Jeep pulled toward him. As they got closer, he realized there were 5 very large men in the Jeep. (I think at this point, he was officially creeped out.) Each vehicle reached it destination almost simultaneously. Tobey put the van in park, opened the door and got out, just as the driver of the Jeep rolled down the window and reached out toward him and with a low growly voice said, “Here ya go.” He had his hand closed around something, and it was in that moment, Tobey realized that he had just helped a woman get to her dealer. He saw his career flash before his eyes. He quickly stepped back and mumbled something like, “Uh, ok I’ll see you later.” He couldn’t get to the car fast enough. He fled the scene like he was running from the Devil himself.

When he got home, he came into the bathroom, where I was enjoying a hot bath and a good book. He said, “Have I got something to tell you,” and proceeded to relay the entire story. I laughed. Finally free of the tension, he laughed too.

“You know, I should have known something was weird,” he said with a wink, “when she made me wear this hat with a big feather sticking out of the top and called me her Pimp Daddy.” Dork.